I love "Why"

My son is in the question asking phase ... And I love it!

Some parents find the constant barrage of questions annoying, but I have found it a great way to start talking about science, even though I know he can not understand it all yet.  So far, I have explained the oxidation of rust, heat transfer principles and the importance of counterbalance on a Duplo tower. 

He spent the first two years exploring, now he is starting to question the world around him, which is the first phase of the Scientific Method.  For other scientists and techies out there, you know the scientific method is the process  scientists use to form a hypothesis, test it, analyze results and draw conclusions. 

Isn't that what childhood is all about?  Testing and drawing conclusions?  So let's help them out and verbalized the process for them. Question what they are thinking and hypothesizing about. Help them set up controlled tests. Help them think through and analyze the data. Listen to their conclusions. 

As my kids learn this process, they will be able to test and solve problems systematically. How exciting is that?

The biggest hope and expectation I have for my kids is that they help to solve the worlds major problems in the future. I will strive to give them the confidence and skills to accomplish that. 

Pride

Parenting can be tiring, especially when you are balancing a job as well. There are many times when I question if it is worth it and if I am modeling the right balance for my kids. 

Then I remind myself, you are the best example of a strong, intelligent woman for your kids. Be proud. 

Be proud of what you do. You are showing your kids that women can contribute in many ways, other than just as moms. At work, in the community and in the family.  Share what you do and what you enjoy about it with your family. 

Be proud of what you have accomplished.  Think about what you have achieved in your life, in both your career and family. Those milestones are an important part of who you are and how you have made an impression on the world. 

Be proud of your goals. Share them with your family.  By collaborating you can make all of your goals even bigger. 

By taking pride and sharing your passions, you help reinforce the confidence and expectations that they can do the same thing (and hopefully even more). 

So keep it up ladies. We can help change gender stereotypes in the tech world in the future. 

Kids room cleanup

Now is the perfect time to prep for school and make room for all the new clothes and supplies you are stocking up on. 

1. Sort

Clothes - starting with the closet is the first thing for me. I try to pare down my son's wardrobe at the end of each season, since he usually starts to grow out of things by then. As we near the end of summer, separate any clothes he/she will not be able to wear next year.  Keep a pile of shorts and short sleeves they may be able to wear in the next few warm weeks or month (these should be the favorites).  

Make sure you include the diaper bag or daycare stash. I usually have extra clothes in strategic locations and need to make sure they still fit. 

Re-evaluate the long pants and shirts to confirm they still fit, as we move into cooler weather.  Double check that you have enough coordinating outfits. 

Donate, sell or store (if you have younger children that may need them) anything that does not fit. This is the ideal time to trade in winter coats and holiday attire (including costumes) to used children/consignment shops. 

Toys - pull out all the toys and books.   Evaluate if they are still age appropriate. Depending on your child's age, involve them in the process to decide what items to give away or sell. 

Closet misc - I have used the upper shelves in my son's closet for storage of toys and books that he is not ready for yet. There is also a handful of baby items that I had not purged yet. Sort through it all and confirm what you want to keep for the future.

Changing table - I still have diapering to do, so I need to sort my changing table and make sure I have not cluttered it with items (such as old creams) that I no longer use. 

2. Scrub

Think spring cleaning. Get your kids involved to give them ownership of their space. 

Remember, everything should be pulled out of the room (except furniture) so you can get drawers and shelves clean. 

3. Set

Clothes - separate the clothes by season.  Put the summer clothes (that they will fit in next year) in a bin for storage. 

Some people organize by color. I usually organize by school clothes and play clothes. 

Toys- I have seen several other blog posts about rotating toys and games. I have also noticed that my son gets overwhelmed when he has too many toys out at once. So pack 3-4 boxes with a mix of toys, games and stuffed animals. Rotate one box out every week, to keep the choices interesting. You can even use the boxes as a toy box to put toys away daily. 

I have also tried this technique with seasonal decorations and activities. Every 3 months I bring out a fresh box of decorations and seasonal books and pack away the old. It gives the house a new feel to have changing decorations. Why wait until Christmas?

I have seen several ideas for corraling Stuffed animals, besides just a toy box.  Hanging nets seem to work well, positioned at child height. On Pinterest they have several ideas for "cages" that kids can pull stuffed animals out between slats, so they can reach the bottom and top of the pile. 

Future items -box up with a dated label

4.  Standardize

Clothes - I have not started it (my son does not care about picking out his clothes yet), but I love those days of the week organizers for clothes. It allows the children to be involved in outfit selection, but helps minimize the arguments in the morning getting dressed. At least that is what I assume. I will let you know when I get a pickier dresser. 

Start a household rule that something needs to go out when something new comes in. This could be clothes, shoes, toys or stuffed animals. This forces everyone to think about if a new item is worth getting rid of an old. 

5.  Sustain

Maintenance of the kids room is really a daily task. Kids should be involved in cleaning their rooms regularly. 

At least quarterly, you should work with your child to evaluate clothes and toys to see if there is anything they have grown out of or do not use anymore. This process sometimes entices them to use old toys again, so they may rediscover something. 

Any other ideas?

Balance - Flex time strategies for work/family

When I was asking recently about part time options at work, my mentor challenged me to really consider my objectives for a modified schedule. Do I really want full extra days with my children, or is extra time mornings or afternoons enough?  If your work hours are flexible, it might be more advantageous for both work and home to modify your schedule and/or work remotely on certain days. 

I recently looked into part time options for my work. If you have a project based job, you may be able to get approval for working less than 5 days during the week. This gives you the benefit of spending extra days with your kids and/or save a little on daycare. The drawback is that you get paid less, even if you end up doing the same amount of work.  Departments are sometimes hesitant to approve these, since they pay full benefits for part time work, so make sure you go into the negotiation with a solid plan and clear requests. 

Another option, if possible at your work, is flexing your schedule. For me, a lot of my key stakeholders are on the East coast, so not much is urgent after 3pm Pacific time. If I start a little earlier, I can leave a little earlier and have extra time to play and prep dinner. I also can catch up on afternoon emails and projects during the evening, after the kids are in bed. 

Some jobs have the benefit of working remotely. It is important to have a focused place to work in your house without distractions, but cutting out makeup prep and commute can give you more dedicated work time. (The biggest problem I have when I work remotely is eating too much. Snacks are much too accessible).

In the end, you need to be creative and find what works for both you and your employer. Your needs may change as the kids grow or even from week to week as certain events come up. If your current employer/job is inflexible, but modified schedule is very important to you, you should consider looking for a role/employer that fits your desired work/life balance. 

I know flexibility is not realistic for everyone, but for those of us that have that benefit, I encourage you to find balance. For me, that balance is working from home on Fridays and leaving at 4pm on other days, using evenings for catch up time. 

Next challenge is making sure I have time for my husband. 

Supporting women engineers

This summer I attended my 20 year high school reunion. In mental preparation for the event, I thought about what I have accomplished in life. 

I could not help feeling like I have yet to make my big " mark" on the world. Yes, I have a masters degree and a decent job, but I have not cured cancer nor solved world hunger...yet. 

Then I remembered one definition of myself that has lasted 20 years. I am an Engineer. I am also a mother and wife, but I am still an Engineer. So what makes me identify so strongly with that descriptor?

I love math and science. I am proud that I decided to study those things, in spite of being one of few females in a lot of my classes. I love solving problems and figuring out how things work. I also believe I bring a different perspective to problems, compared to my male counterparts. Maybe it is more empathy for the people side of an equation...maybe it is a preference for finesse rather than brute force. Either way, I think it strengthens collaboration to have a diverse team working on complex problems. 

Which leads me to a newly defined goal...support of women in engineering and science from birth through motherhood. There are many programs and organizations for school age kids that encourage science and math. As mothers, we are in unique positions to act as role models and start inspiring our children to embrace math and science from the beginning. We can talk about what we do and expose our kids to science through museums and activities. It's never too early to start introducing the scientific method...hypothesis, testing, collecting data, drawing conclusions. 

I will always be a mother. I believe I will always be an Engineer, whether that is my job title or not. I will continue to solve problems and share my passion with the next generation.